How do I explain to you that the world is not made for little girls?
How do I calmly point to theoretical texts, real world examples, and consequential disorders, depression, and low self-esteem to demonstrate that this world is not for us?
How do I convince you that when you hand over a dumpster truck to a little boy who's playing in the mud and put a girl in a skirt and tell her to be "lady-like" while she totes around a baby doll, you're doing much more that just assigning gendered playtime activities?
How do I convince you that just because there are badass representations of women as scientists, detectives, and national leaders on television shows and movies, it does not mean that it is representative of progression in our society?
How do I convince you that men rape women? In other words, how do I convince you that alcohol, push-up bras, see-through tops, lipstick, and short shirts don't rape women? Furthermore, how do I convince you that one or all of those things do not get women raped? How do I convince you that at the end of the day, the responsibility of rape falls on the one who raped, and that's it?
How do I convince you that both men and women discredit women's testimonies of being raped because they have internalized the notion that "easy" women or "drunk" women are "asking for it?" How do I convince you that victim blaming is the reason that the majority of rapes are never reported?
How do I convince you that women still make less than money men do - and no, it is not merely because of statistical discrepancies regarding types of employment?
How do I convince you that just because one woman blogs about submission in a godly marriage does not mean she can represent the crucifixion of feminism?
How do I convince you that silencing girls when they're young - for talking "too loud" or being "too sassy" - in order to tame them has incredibly serious consequences for the future when their lives depend on speaking out?
How do I convince you that the use of decontextualized parts of women's bodies in advertisement industries has a serious effect on the way that women's bodies are treated in lived realities?
How do I convince you that it takes a serious toll on women's psyche when their thoughts, ideas, beliefs, and feelings are consistently belittled and attributed to emotional irrationality despite legitimacy and/or urgency in their content?
How do I convince you that cat-fights are a method of patriarchal strategizing that pits women against each other - causing them to inflict harm on one another so that those with power can wipe hands clean? How do I convince you that they are not the product of some "natural" disconnectedness between women?
How do I convince you that women working together have the potential to change the world that isn't made for little girls, but institutions of marriage, demands in the workforce, lingering gendered house chores, and low wages keep women separated from one another?
How do I convince you that it is simply not okay to whistle at a woman passing by on the street? How do I convince you that simply telling women to "watch out" for creepers when they're alone does not fix any problem whatsoever?
How do I convince you that women are deserving, loving, driven, capable, intelligent dreamers and remain largely unsatisfied with quality of life because they were born into a world that does not want them...
UNLESS...
they are Pretty and Submissive and Not Too Smart But Not Dumb and White and Dependent and Quiet (Unless You Talk About Acceptable Topics) and Motherly and Thin and Sexual But Not Too Many Partners and Marriageable and Kind and Sacrificial and all the while, Happy?
How do I convince you?
" How do I convince you that at the end of the day, the responsibility of rape falls on the one who raped, and that's it?"
ReplyDeleteThis phrase contradicts the rest of the paragraph. Unless I just read it wrong, or it's a typo.
Kayla, there is no typo. The phrase reinforces those prior to it which say that the only one responsible for rape is the one who rapes; it has nothing to do with what a rape victim wears, for example, and clothing choices don't "get" women raped.
ReplyDelete